New England Away Kit Launch
by Herr Neil
English football’s brightest and dimmest were in Manchester this week to launch the new England away kit.
The scarlet red kit is inspired by the kit of 1966, when England won the World Cup on home soil. Among it’s key features are gold coloured names and numbers, enlarged squad numbers on the front right shoulder and a single gold star, representing England’s solitary triumph in the history of international football competitions, the World Cup finals of 1966.
Yet the most significant aspect of the new kit is the England badge. Whereas previous versions of the England away kit were also red, harking back to the era of Hurst, Moore and Banks and the famous World Cup win of ’66, England didn’t actually win anything with these new kits. The cause of this has now been traced to the size of the badge on the kit. The original away kit from the legendary 1966 squad had a much larger badge than the more modern kits.
This has thankfully been rectified with this latest edition. Once opponents see our boys living in the past with their full size badges, they will surely feel obliged to not find a way round England’s one-dimensional attacking play or goad Rio Ferdinand into a petulant outburst, earning him a second yellow of the match.
The new kit, reminding everyone that we haven’t won anything since 1966, is available in all good sporting outlets now!
March 1st, 2006 at 11:24 am
Surely if we are to stop the Brazillian shirts looking like a school swot’s star chart, FIFA need to bring in some rules regarding stars on shirts. Something along the lines of individual players only being allowed to have stars if they’ve actually won a World Cup. Then even Ronaldo would only have 2 stars clogging up his shirt and it might give our boys an added incentive to win this summer.
March 3rd, 2006 at 1:26 pm
Is the kit available in brown?
March 3rd, 2006 at 3:23 pm
If you roll around in the mud a lot, then yes, brown is available.
Alternatively you could dye a regular kit brown. Although, the FA have yet to announce a lucrative tie-up with UK dye kingpins Dylon, launching an England player endorsed range of high-quality, low-bleed dyes* so any colour alterations would probably invalidate any guarantee that comes with the shirt.
*Although perhaps they should…
Red Rooney
Orange Owen
Blue Beckham
Wright-Philips White
Lampard’s Lilac
Cole’s Colour-Fastner
And of course…
Wes Brown
and
Robert Green
March 4th, 2006 at 3:23 pm
Has The Ghost of Dennis Watts inadvertantly let the cat out of the bag? Is it true that the new England manager will be Sam Aller-DYES?
March 6th, 2006 at 2:39 pm
I think the new boss will be Guus Hidpink, Graeme Bluness or Craig Brown.