Official WCH Drinking Game (ii)
by Herr NeilYou know the score, drink a glass of cherryade* every time one of the following happens. This is the second part of this article, to read the first click here.
A player:
- attempts a stupid trick that goes wrong
- attempts a stupid trick that goes right, but gets the player nowhere
- makes a diving motion to the referee when he’s adjudged to have fouled someone
- makes a ‘ball shape’ with his hands to the referee after he has just felled an opponent with a cynical two-footed lunge
- raises an imaginary card to the referee after a team-mate has been fouled
- does more than one roll after being fouled
- does a ‘rock the baby’ goal celebration
- involves the corner flag in their goal celebration [half a glass]
- picks up the ball and juggles/squeezes it before taking the kick-off
- is shorter than the player escort who walks out with them
- sprays an energy drink at the camera
- hoofs the ball away at full-time
The TV footage:
- zooms right in on a players face at a crucial time
- can’t keep up with the action
- replays a goal or incident from more than three angles
- breaks into a montage
- returns to a random man/woman/child in the crowd at least three times
- by mistake, shows a brief shot of some thick cables lying on the ground
- shows sexy female fans from one of the countries playing
- extra glass if they aren’t particularly dressed up in national colours and are just being shown because they are pretty
- a commercial break shows an advertisement for a product that has zero connection to football, but uses football to pimp its wares
- take an extra drink if the product is officially endorsed by England/FIFA (Sainsburys, Mastercard, etc)
Do any ‘Nachfolger des Fußballflußpferds’ out there have any other suggestions for appropriate drinking junctures?
*Enjoy cherryade responsibly
May 30th, 2006 at 10:37 am
- Drink an eggcup of cherryade whenever the camera shows a close-up of a plane flying over the stadium or an arty shot of the moon.
- Drink a third of a glass when a player points at his leg to show the referee the mark left by a tackle
- Drink half a glass each time a player touches his lip/nose/head and checks to see if he is bleeding after a perfectly fair aerial challenge (an extra half if he looks like he might cry)
May 30th, 2006 at 1:52 pm
Drink a glass and a half if a player kisses his goalkeeper after a penalty save.
May 31st, 2006 at 7:18 am
Take a drink every time the footage cuts to the commentators in the stands with their microphones to their lips. Bonus drink if they are actually commentating at the time.
May 31st, 2006 at 10:34 am
In addition to that last comment, drink another half glass if Motty waves or tells his co-commentator to wave.
June 5th, 2006 at 3:10 am
Full glass when a player gives the ref the “‘No-No’ finger wag” after being called for a bad tackle. 2 glasses if it is the holding midfielder.